New Year, Real Me
Thursday, January 19, 2017
Towards the end of the year, I had taken a risk in pursuit of my own happiness and my own peace of mind and it was one of the best decisions I've ever made. Despite my life taking what felt like a compete 360° and losing people once close to me in the process, living my life for myself and on my own terms in pursuit of my own happiness has changed my life for the better. In the transition from 2016 to 2017, I've learned a couple things that I wanted to share with you considering they've helped me become more productive, and more importantly, truly happy.
Number one, it's okay to feel sad. Trust me, it's okay to be upset over life throwing you countless curveballs, considering I feel like I've been thrown so many curveballs that I've become numb to the thought of life plans not going as anticipated. Life doesn't usually happen the way we plan, and it's up to you to take that sadness, take that curveball that life's thrown at you, and figure out how you're going to fix it. Earlier in the year, I had written a post on feeling stuck in life, where I just kept complaining about how my life had remained stagnant and I was perpetually sad and not doing anything about it. Never remain stagnant in life, we as people are always supposed to be growing and maturing and it's through taking those bad thoughts and bad feelings, and channeling them into solutions that you'll achieve true growth in your life. You'll thank yourself in the long run and you will adopt a more positive outlook in life (I'm living proof).
Number two, to be vulnerable. I had been shown a TedTalk of Brene Brown talking about vulnerability and a 20 minute video has never made me reflect on my life so much to the point where there were tears. Throughout 2016, I had numbed myself emotionally because I didn't want to feel certain feelings and in doing that, I had also numbed the feeling of happiness. Don't do that, I beg you please don't do that. I had experienced so many things that could've possibly gone wrong that I had almost become entirely pessimistic; I took my feelings of uncertainty and I made them certain by ultimately saying that I just wouldn't succeed. Brown spoke about vulnerability as not being a bad word, but to mean that we should live and do things that have no guarantee because that's what brings true joy. Being vulnerable involves being your own authentic self and stop being what people want you to be. It means recognizing that you are good enough, that we're imperfect but that we're worthy of love and belonging. To love with your whole heart even though there's no guarantee. To feel vulnerable is to be alive, and to feel truly alive is an ethereal feeling.
Number three, to forgive. Spending 366 days in 2016, one day too many might I add, I've learned that it's important to forgive. Forgive all those stupid petty fights you had in high school and just leave it in high school. Just call whoever it is you're still mad at over something that you don't even remember fighting about and just apologize. The peace of mind, the maturity, and the weight lifted off your chest that comes is so much better than holding on to things from so long ago. The people that you were fighting with then have grown up from the person that they've used to be and so have you. If people are against you making peace with others, it's a sign it's time for those people to go. Life is never an ultimatum, and if someone makes you choose, choose happiness and choose peace of mind. It's time to grow up my loves, and growing up has never felt so good.
Sitting here and writing this post, I have felt the kind of happiness today that could quite literally have made my heart burst. I'm so happy to be where I am at the moment; I'm surrounded by people who bring me utter joy, who empower me to live my best life, who make me feel loved, and wow I'm just, for once I am truly happy. I never want this feeling to go away and I just want everyone I know to experience the happiness that I do. I'm so thankful for the people that have pushed me and opened my eyes to be where I am, especially to the very special person who took these photos. I'm so excited for this year, I'm so excited to push myself in all aspects of life, and I'm so excited to invest more time in this blog. Let's do this 2017.
Love always, Annika xx
Photos shot and edited by: Van Bui (loml)
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